And since I promised you Sauce-readers something with boy-psyche stench on it� this might just fit. This took some actual introspection to complete�and as such is nearly impossible for dis boy� you can laugh at the fruits of my efforts.

[Beyond that, it is where I hurt someone�s feelings in regard to Blondness� and have long since commented about that and done the Mea Culpa piece in response. Further, she felt I had taken the exercise too far� and I may have as I was learning something about myself and never do the looking inward bit.]

Rather than learning how to differentiate text by varied fonts in HTML form, I am putting five asterisks after her snippets/before my own. I hope that works for you.

And if it doesn�t? Close the browser and come back soon.

Here goes [bald psyche? Maybe. DaSauce? Damned right.]:

---snip---

Star Sign: Taurus

*****Bullshit! [Sorry. The whole horrorscope thing is hilarious. Add Taurus�and I saw an opportunity.]

Height: 5'11"

*****Within reach for just about any purpose. [I�m a dork.]

Hair color: blonde

*****This was the first problematic moment. Not to say that I wouldn�t be thrilled to fall face down in the mud over any incredible and worthy-human-like/female person--More a strange lack of je ne sais quoi. But then you might not be truly blond. And then I feel stupid as shit for even having mentioned such feelings�are there blond pheromones?

Eye color: one is half green

*****You have eyes. That is good. I like eyes.

Cigarettes: Never

*****Good. I am quitting on a VERY regular basis with intent to become-one-with-this-state. Although that post-coital moment might be missed for the half second it takes me to realize I am my son�s only parent and that I have hated the stank and the taste, and the monkey for longer than a human should.

Religion: Spiritual is good.

*****Never made any form of leap O� faith. I think Atheists are as confused as Catholics� Although my tastes are catholic (but that would be another word from another time.)

Eye Color: Bedroom

****Frigging Smoldering Blue/Green/Hazel, Lady.

Last great book I read: Actually, it was 'Multiple Streams of Income' by Robert G. Allen. Not very funny at all...or really something I would consider great... actually it�s simply the last book I read, period. So I guess that really doesn't even answer the question...

***** Sounds like you wouldn�t much like the prospect of lying side-by-side reading with someone you loved� But maybe I am projecting.

If I could be anywhere at the moment: Ego et rex meus in a big, poofy bed in 5 star hotel somewhere cool like NYC, or exotic like a private island with a very smart, creative, tall, handsome man who adores me madly (and vice versa), a glass of champagne and some chocolate cake, deeply embroiled in some delightful form of mutual worship.

***** You and yer King, eh? (Too much Latin in my childhood.) You sound costly (Laughing.) But this did give me pause. I am comfortable in nearly all situations�I don�t care if it is the Landmark Hotel in London, or a (was gonna say Motel Six, but�um, how about Embassy Suites or something where there are two rooms?) Anyway, I love the idea, but it is not what I NEED, ya-know? Still and all, I�d like to have a private island/pied-�-terre or a cabin on one off of Maine or something at some point. If I EVER had the fiscal wherewithal�as I seem to generally spend what I make�and make more when I need to spend more. I do need to grow up there. [Grudgingly.] As to the VERY SMART? I am not willing to decide what IS smart for someone else. Creative? Mostly. Tall? I guess uncomfortable in Econo-Seats at 6� 4� would fit the bill�as my knees always leave the tray at a 45-degree angle. Champagne� I am just as happy with bubble water. That last line is compelling yet (since I am being oddly picky at the moment) again, gave me pause. Yes. Agreed. But I wonder if it needs to be so flowery? I am a simple sort. Or I feel like one. Or I am complex but like to be a simple sort? Sheesh. Forget it.

Song or album that puts me in the mood: Really, anything from Mozart to Metallica to Meshell Ndege Ocello to Mystikal could do it depending on the time and place... but D'Angelo will do it always, everytime.

***** Music sometimes gets in the way of mood for me�as my overall sexual self can be wildly divergent. Something about music� Hey! I�ve got it. NEVER been able to yell at a DJ for instant music change mid-coitus. Timing and rhythm change in a blink sometimes�and for me, choreographing such would be tough. Fast and riveting (that was a rosy picture) can drop tempo to slow and languid, and vice-versa, dig? Hoooboy. Enough there. That bit is too much fun to think about during this 30 minutes of fiddling around with answers.

I'm a hoot-and-a-half; I've got a 135 IQ and a killer rack:

***** My only real pause here? I can�t imagine telling someone else my IQ, as somehow, I have trouble equating it with smarts of various sorts. Again, that simple thing comes to a head. Beyond that I deal with some of the smartest IDIOTS on the planet. Some folks are able to do astonishing things but don�t remember social courtesy. Programmers and Artists (the good ones) really are nearly autistic in many ways. VERY singularly focused individuals often are?

I'm a woman with sense of taste and elegance, and yet with an atavistic urge to explore and satisfy more uncivilized forms of behavior:

*****This is the stuff that I get squirmy about. And I have trouble coming up with why� Anything I note here is going to sound trite. Shall I go ahead and continue to make an ass of myself? Hey! Why not? Do not take umbrage, please? This is meant in the way I accepted this task in general�and that is with great joy at the offer to do so, and in honor of your question/without any judgment per se, but rather a feeling about differences. No right or wrong. [Asinine Disclaimer Ends] Sounds like a romance novel (which is cool if that was the intent�) Major But Coming: something about my odd upbringing is rearing. Taste and elegance once mentioned are now not tasteful almost? Damn. This is hard to enunciate. I have TASTE. Not that I give a shit what others think in some ways�and in other ways I LIVE to be cautious of those around me. I can be elegant�in a very simple and loving way. But I hate the pretentiousness I associate with them?

I am above average in every way- educated, intelligent, motivated, fiery, strong, spontaneous, as wild as I am sophisticated, very sexual/sensual. Basically just a boatload of fun really:

*****Not that I feel comfortable saying so, but, I guess some of that would be true of me (minus some of the spontaneity as I do like to nest a bit�but in the same breath I am apt to be naked and looking at the stars or spitting cold water at a naked bed partner on a whim.) My PROBLEM? These are the kinds of things I could NEVER actually THINK OR SAY about myself? Shit. This is overly introspective. I am getting crawly. [Grin.]

NOTE: I'm REAL serious about the age & height thing!

*****OK. But I wonder why, even though I fit the bill?

Yes I'm about to give the proverbial laundry list of desires, but I assure you everything I ask for you will get in return and then some. (Mostly what I want from my man is his attention.)

*****That I give.

I AM NOT interested in your money or your ability to get me into Playboy. I'm not seeking to obtain a recording contract or the lead role that you think I'm perfect for in the script you're writing/producing/directing. I'm not impressed by your rich and/or famous friends/family/ neighbors/clients. I don't care about your Ferrari 550 Marinello or your Lamborghini Diablo (ok, ok... if you let ME drive I'll care). I AM IMPRESSED by an easygoing, relaxed man who is in control (NOT controlling)of himself, his life, and the situations surrounding him. He is as soft on the inside as he his hard on the outside. A man who humbly appreciates those who aren't as fabulous as he is and treats them with respect and dignity. A healthy, strong, softspoken self-confidence WITHOUT an obnoxious ego.

*****You are singing to the choir, sistah!

A man who dresses with style and flair- only leaves the house in sweats when he's going to the gym,

***** Here�s where the BIG-ASS Uh-Oh�s started for me. Style is whatever anyone decides it is� But whatever that is�I only have it because I dictate it�and it is accepted from me. I am the only guy I know that ends up in a Fortune 10-type Board�s Board Room chatting with their CEO while wearing Tevas and Shorts�and feels comfortable, and isn�t made to feel uncomfortable. I don�t dress up to meet someone else�s odd need for a suit. I own a few, but they are for things that would upset someone if I didn�t play dress-up. I can get away with it because of reputation and the knowledge that whoever all those game folks are, they-as-a-crew--pulled in 14B last year�and whatever they are they have valuable insight. [Rant ends.] I am a jeans and t�s guy, and I�ll probably never accessorize to fit someone else. I will however make them feel loved/wanted/needed in all other ways. I am the ultimate GIVER (who happily takes when appropriate. Fair�s fair. Grin.)

�and smells good (I'll smell remnants of a cologne I like in an elevator and try to track the guy down.)

***** I smell good always. But for me, smelling good is soap. Clean teeth. Fresh overall. I prefer real parfum to anything chemical-based, for gals though�and yet, again, I think soap is sexier.

. I am impressed by skillful, seductive, kinky, creative, lusty, uninhibited sex. I'm impressed by creativity, imagination, and spontaneity. Surprises. Honesty, forthrightness, fun, humor, and silliness. Adventure. A man who appreciates the fine qualities of healthy flirtation.

***** Mostly, I agree. But, sometimes sex is just as good when it is gentle/loving/relaxing, and comfy. Let�s not push it into OLYMPIC proportions always, although that can be fun too.

I believe it is a gentleman's duty to make every woman in the room feel good through a little flirtation. Meanwhile, he knows no matter who I flirt with or who flirts with me- everyone is crystal clear that I'm HIS woman.

***** Hrm. Soap opera content again? I guess this is a matter of perspective. I get accused by every male I know of being a precocious flirt�and it ALWAYS surprises me. I never FEEL like I am flirting or playing in any way. I just focus on the folks I am around? I genuinely make them comfortable and make them laugh? Dunno how to explain it. But, I am DEEPLY and to my CORE a monogamist. Nothing else matters.

A man who is true to his word.

***** My word is always true. I don�t offer it lightly. Ever. My dad made promises he never kept. My son will never get a promise from me unless I consider it a fait accompli. Period. Nor anyone else for that matter. I probably could have played off your response asking why I didn�t feel we matched with something that would have had you in deep interest with me�but instead, I suspect that you are now going, �Not so much�NameEditDaSauce� This is who I am.

Versatility- a man who knows which fork to use,

*****I always know which fork, and why dessert forks exist. What a demitasse spoon is, and where it goes, and I do try to make those around me comfortable�but beyond that, these are things I do not give a rat�s ass about? Maybe this entire simple-EditSauceGuyName-thing is pretentious instead? I don�t know. That would take introspection and I am an oafish male.

owns his own tux

***** Sh�yeah. Right. In another world? Never owned one. Probably never will unless I get involved with someone who has to attend shit that requires such. I�d be VERY concerned if I got the urge. But you are still sweet, Ma�am. No attack intended. Just differences.

but isn't above stripping and skinnydipping in the ocean on a warm summer night or jumping in a giant mud puddle fully clothed.

***** I will sing THAT song forever. I taught my son puddle jumping at an early age. I piss in showers. I skinnydip anytime I won�t upset anyone. I not only can-but-do--pee off of REALLY high areas because I can and I am a male. I live to revel in everything I see and do. Take THAT!

---snip---

--DatEndsDaTryingToPuzzleThroughMeself.

PS. That was the most I have looked at my own innards in years�and I almost didn�t put it up because it felt too personal�but you know? That�s what this place is for�and I made a promise to give you something with real inside-me content.