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2003-04-16 --- 19:46

Teats, Hooters, And The Food Bane Of Humanity?

OK.

Now and again, YerSauce is going to take a stand that doesn�t jibe with the largely female population here at DairyLand.

Three times in the past week, this boy has been accosted for his attitude on Hooters Restaurants. Well, not really accosted. And not three times. More like two. Three sounded good, but to be his normal honest self DaDullard has to fess.... Exactly two, actually. Which as luck has it is the number of breasts we humans carry about with us. Obviously this is a conspiracy of the highest order.

Anyway.

Hooters. Between their surprisingly tasty Oyster Shooters and their normally really good Three Mile Island wings�this Diarist has been a two or three times a year attendee at their establishments for a number of years now.

For the nonce we�ll leave off the discussions about how outside of Florida they label their fish dish Grouper�s Cousin in a shoddy attempt to make you believe you are getting the ever-yummy-when-fresh-and-moist Grouper�as that would be a digression and we ain�t talking about fishy smelling stuff. We�re talking Hooters here.

You can take is as part of the public record that DaSauce is not a Teat Man� to him, the lovely fleshy appendages roar in at a lowly 5th, 6th, or 7th as body parts on the female of the species go�So attending a food-house with bad-taste HoJo Orange Short-Shorts and Titties And Beer are not of the highest priority for this guy. Read back in DaJournal. There's proof that breasts ain't high priority.

But fair-to-middlin� wings and oyster shooters? They count.

Now, there is something special about SoVerySoCal and Orange County in particular. We have Republican Political Correctness. Read that again, as it hurts DisBoy�s head as well. So, these phrigging goofball BMW drivers who are happily willing to destroy a woman�s right to Choice and call themselves Pro-Life? [Which by the way? Seems blatantly wrong. Um, whether or not I could support a significant other in the decision to be rid of an-as-yet embryonic human Acorn Compared To An Oak Tree baby? I suspect that all but your average serial murderer is Pro-Life. But then Anti-Choice would have been correct and uncomfortable for them� DICKS!!] Sorry. So, these botulism-injecting dames who care more about Rush Limbaugh than say�Christian Love (whether Christian or not?)

They find it appalling that DaDiarist of Record here would take his son to Hooters. Now, that my never-met-friends is called taking a stand. Yeah, lady. Thanks. And you didn�t marry some frigging schlump of the week for money, and a silly Germanic auto? You want to bitch at the gals who are probably getting damned good tips from Tipsy Tit Lovers? And yet you personally are a stay at home�nanny-fied human whose only real job is the local phucking Plush Ass Gym?

Bite my ass. And bite my son�s ass. He likes wings too. And when he was little? DaDiarist called him Name-Here Breast Detective, as he would latch on any passing boob. POW! Vast Gummy Baby Wet Spot On Chest For Anyone Sporting Likely Looking Teats. He may be a Hooter Guy� Shit. Who knows? He may want them on himself� Ah, parenting!

That�s all DisDiarist had to say.

--DaSauceOfAllVitriolForWarrentlessStandTaking

PS.? Tonight�s Weird Link is a woman who is all upset at getting shit �Oh, my god! Seventh Graders are hooting at me� about being cranky about Hooters.

PPS. Don�t Eat At The Newport Beach Hooters. When the waitress nods and looks unsurprised because the wings taste moldy? And notes that her boss has to pay cash these days because he is busy siphoning off the monies better served buying inventory? Skip that particular franchise. Not worth the bad taste.

~*~
6 comments so far
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