[Having been one, that should have read frequently� but it just didn�t sound as good in the lede.]

More often than not it is at a time where some idiotic-piece-of-not-yet-quite-dry-shit decides to tell us all something we already know. And they do so on the public dime, no less. Then. Then. Then? Then! Then, some fluffy-phucker of a reporter or editor decides that they are going to take up space on newsprint and bandwidth on the airwaves and in our expensive pipelines from the �net with the Oh-So-Very-Cogent piece of datum.

Asswipes.

A parental case in point? Tired kids are apt to have more problems according to some well-paid Dr. Dufus at the N.I.H.

REALLY?!?

You wouldn�t shit us on this, right? You mean they are crankier? They have more accidents on the playground? They are less apt to pay attention? They have more health problems? And lower grades? You wouldn�t shit a shithead on this would you?

No way!?!

C�mon. Pull the other one. [And not that tripod portion, please.]

Well. Bone me with a spoon.

As if any parent not-making-seven-day-a-week, twenty-four-hour-a-day, brain-death-attempts with Crank/Crack/Crock wouldn�t know that? Tired kids act tired and respond with tired responses? Swell of you to tell us such incredibly insightful stuff.

Hey! Great idea. You don�t even have to pay DaSauce for the thought. How about you follow that one up with a 300 million-dollar study that notes that Adults Have The Same Problem?

Wait. While at it?

You could do the always useful on a slow-news-day study on teens and alcohol where they do stupid shit like having more sex and much of that unprotected and with lots more partners when buzzed like a frigging moon shiner at tax time. That one makes headlines every quarter or so. And it is always teens or college students. Never mentions the rest of humanity. Odd, that.

The one I never see? [And this would be fun, really!]

You could do a study trying to find out why those who spend a kajillion dollars and plenty of nonsense on Dumb Ass� studies often get ridiculed in public. See above, Dearest Doctor Dickhead.

And for the follow up? We could discuss the prospect of DatSauceGuy offering free phucking quick-drying cement high-colonics to the first hundred participants�and then we could study how irritating, self-aggrandizing-on-my-nickel bitches always end up with SEVERE (and deadly,) CONSTIPATION.

--YourSauceForAllSillyFuckingScientificStudies

PS. Thanks for your patience with my need to have a minor rant. Last night�s public speaking engagement by DaShrub was quite an experience, and I didn�t feel like bitching about our Beloved/Brain-dead Leader.

PPS. I�ll do something fluffy and full of bunnies, and then follow it with an entry just brimming with real emotion and inner-drama soon. Promise.

Pssst? Maybe I just need to get my potty-mouth out �cuz I don�t do it in front of DaBoy.